Anemic

Where is the ladder and where do I stand? My pockets are empty so I fill them with sand.I get heavier and I go under. My eyes feel rain and my heart feels thunder. Sometimes I can separate. I put in the line between real and fake. I don't want to hide, I just want to feel. Then my secrets can be revealed. I want to share my stories with strangers. My creativity searches for the small favors. I want to grow and stop sleeping in the closet. I stare out the window because that is what I do to forget. I look through the glass so I can lose my need to feel the ground.I want to get high and forget how to get down. I want to make time so it doesn't make me. I want to run out of excuses so I can stop being lazy.
-B